It all began on October 16th, a Friday. About a month prior to this I had seen a little one's picture and profile on an agency's waiting list. Three years old and absolutely precious. Her needs were scary. Complex heart disease. I prayed over her. I waited. I wrestled. She looked familiar. The caption above her video said, "Watch her sweet video and get ready to lose your heart." I did! A few weeks went by, and David and I began having conversations. We sought the Lord together, and we were open. I told David about the little one I was praying for and thinking about. Then it was Friday, October 16th, and over that weekend we were ready to take steps forward to begin another adoption. Well, I checked the agency's waiting list again, and she was gone. I actually rejoiced because I believed that she had gotten matched to a family. Come Monday, October 19th, I looked at the agency's advocacy site and clicked on the shared list link. (I never do that. It breaks my heart!) This is the list where countless children wait, children who are overlooked, children who do not get placed, children with complex needs. And there she was, her precious little face! My heart sank and leapt at the same time. She wasn't matched, she had gone back to the shared list. I showed her to David, he watched her video, and he said, "She looks like a Metzgar." That's all I needed to hear! At this point I contacted the wonderful woman who manages the advocacy site, and I had my first conversation with her which would begin our 3rd adoption journey. She checked the shared list, and this little one's file was not there. So, that meant her file was most likely picked up by another agency. We prayed and felt God leading us to pursue her. We just couldn't let her go. We were told that if we applied to the agency, they could then try to track down which agency had her file. We felt peace. God had placed us in great hands, and we were confident that He would use our agency to lead us to our daughter. There were no guarantees that we would be matched with this little one, but we had to try. We quickly got the paperwork ball rolling and applied. On my birthday, October 28th, we were official. David and I went out to dinner to the Orchid Thai Restaurant, (Lan is her Chinese name meaning "orchid") and this flower was on my dinner plate. :)
The following Monday I had my first conversation with our assigned case worker who has just been a blessing and a delight. She began working on finding out information as to which agency had received the file. The next day we had the name of the agency! We were so hopeful as the team at our agency made the contact. The story was that another family was reviewing the file and that we could check back in two weeks. If she wasn't matched, then they would consider transferring the file to our agency. We waited and prayed diligently all the while trusting God that if she was our daughter, then nothing would thwart His plans! We were expecting to hear something the week of Thanksgiving. Our agency made the contact but received no response. More than a week later they finally responded and again said that they had families interested in reviewing her file. At this point it seemed as if the other agency was not willing to transfer the file as long as they still had families wanting to review it. So, it was decided that we would check back again after the holiday season and the new year. God continued to give us peace as we trusted in Him. Our team checked again, as promised, on Monday, January 4th. It was the same story again. Our wonderful, persistent agency checked again the next Monday, January 11th, same story. However, they did say that they would lose the file back to the shared list on January 19th (exactly 3 months as to when they received the file). I had a long conversation with our case worker on Tuesday about the possible scenarios. We were ready and prepared for whatever God said. We knew we would have an answer come Monday. Unexpectedly, the very next day, Wednesday afternoon, January 13th, she called! I heard our case worker's excited voice on the other end of the line. Goosebumps! "We got her!" she said. "They are transferring the file!" Praise be to God! The waiting was over! God had finally spoken! She was meant to be ours! We immediately submitted our Letter of Intent, and it was off to China one week ago today on Friday, January 15th. We are now waiting for our pre approval.
God had us wait. And He was in the waiting. He is in the waiting now, yet again. We may not fully understand this side of heaven why He does things the way He does. But we trust Him! He has spoken, and our hearts are confirmed! She is our daughter! Our little Lan Lan. The details of her life have been planned by her Maker since the beginning of time. We are naming her "Presley" which means "from the Priest's meadow". We will keep her middle name as "Lan" our beautiful orchid. She has been hand picked by God from His meadow. We pray that her life will bloom and grow and give praise to the One who made her with purpose and for a purpose!
"For we know, brothers and sisters loved by God, that He has chosen you." 1 Thessalonians 1:4
"For we know, brothers and sisters loved by God, that He has chosen you." 1 Thessalonians 1:4
This story actually begins almost two years ago. My eyes were opened to children who wait due to complex heart conditions. We have a heart baby ourselves, our little Lindy. She was born with a serious heart condition, yet she was blessed with life saving surgery in China. The repairs she received have allowed her to live with no physical limitations. Sadly, we were not with her when she endured her surgeries, but we are eternally grateful that she received this gift! She requires ongoing cardiac care through monitoring, but her heart issues have really been a non issue. Two years ago my sister's family was in the process of adopting two complex heart babies who had not yet received surgical intervention. The past two years I have read story after story at 28daysofhearts.blogspot.com and at nohandsbutours.com about many more families who have embarked on this journey of adopting these special kiddos. Precious ones who have life threatening heart disease. It struck a chord deep in my heart. It's scary, unpredictable, and it brings pain. Yet these kids, these families! Such joy! They are living out their love for our Savior by adopting little heart warriors and turning them into warriors for the kingdom! They may run into the arms of Jesus before their parents. I'll be honest, the thought of that brings me deep sorrow. Yet, what greater reward is there than being thrust into eternity to dwell with the King of Kings forever! It's risky to love knowing that it may lead to loss. However, the greatest love of all given freely to us through Christ's sacrifice has to lead to love of others. Every child deserves to receive that kind of love. The love of a family, and most importantly, the love of Christ!
"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19
"For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again." 2 Corinthians 5:14-15
" But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. " Titus 3:4-7
"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19
"For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again." 2 Corinthians 5:14-15
" But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. " Titus 3:4-7
So, God has been preparing our hearts to receive a little one whose heart needs help. Physically, our little one's heart is quite unique and complex, and she will require serious medical attention. There are many unknowns, and we are stepping into unfamiliar territory. We don't know exactly what to expect nor what we will face. We will do our best to be educated and prepared to get her the best medical care we can find. We will be by her side, loving her and taking care of her every step of the way. And yet, we also certainly know that our little one's greatest need is for her heart to be healed spiritually. Praise be to God that we know the only One who can fully heal her, save her, and restore her. This gives us incredible hope! We are humbled and blessed to get the privilege to point her heart to Jesus, the One who made her precious in His sight.
So, this journey we're on is a wild ride! And it's only just begun! Yet we wouldn't be any place else because we trust the One who has it all planned. And we know that we can trust Him because He loves us, and He loves our little hand picked flower, Presley Lan!
So, this journey we're on is a wild ride! And it's only just begun! Yet we wouldn't be any place else because we trust the One who has it all planned. And we know that we can trust Him because He loves us, and He loves our little hand picked flower, Presley Lan!
