Reflections

So much has happened in the past month . . . it will be hard to put it all into words. But I am going to try to reflect when I feel inspired. Our time in China, meeting our little precious, was AMAZING! It seems like yesterday in so many ways, yet it seems so long ago. I can hardly remember life without our little Joy! So, she came to our hotel room on a rainy day at the end of October (the day after my birthday). As she entered the room, she immediately began pointing to each of us and calling us by name, "Ba Ba, Ma Ma, Jie Jie, Ge Ge". She smiled, played, and entertained us. (That hasn't stopped!)She said goodbye to her caretakers and settled right in. I fed her some noodles (a favorite food), and she patiently let me. However, after a bit, she took over and handled the chopsticks like a pro.

We gave her her first bath, which she loved, and we dressed her in new pajamas. I lovingly folded her clothes and put them away as a keepsake. The only time she showed any sorrow was when the lights went out. She and I cried together as I held her, rocked her, and grieved along with her. Yet I am thankful that she embraced her emotions and allowed herself to feel the hugeness of what was happening. To jump ahead a bit . . . I knew that we had made progress when she no longer cried at bedtime. After about a week of being home, our daughter was at peace at bedtime. It was a joyous night! We went through the routine . . . bath, jammies, brush teeth, read books, the whole family singing a goodnight song, hugs and kisses for everyone, and Mommy laying down in bed with her as she drifted off with a smile on her face. Praise God! Our daughter felt safe, protected, loved and peaceful.

 

Back to China . . . the second day was our official adoption day. It was October 30th, the exact day that she had been abandoned. We went through the ceremony promising to care for this precious child. She had her footprints stamped in red ink which she loved. Joy Yun became a Metzgar! She was ours, she is ours, she is dearly loved, and she is a part of us just as God had planned from the beginning of time.

The third day we went to Beihai to visit Joy's orphanage and her supposed place of birth. This was the emotional day. Seeing where she had lived for the past three years. Hugging her special nanny who loved and cared for her. Saying goodbye to her nanny and shedding many tears. Witnessing the exact spot where she was forsaken, out in the open just around the corner from the orphanage. Knowing that her birth Mother loved her and was trying to do the best she could for her. Meeting the shop owner who called the police. Grieving for her loss and accepting the fact that she had to wait for us for three years. Feeling connected to a place so far away. Wanting to return someday to show our daughter where her life began. Remembering to trust in the Lord with all of our hearts and to not lean on our own understanding. Knowing that His ways are right, good, and perfect.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11